Memory management in Windows is often misunderstood. This is not surprising, because its memory management model is both complex and evolving.
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The definitive source of info is found in chapter 7 of this book. 5th edition is due out soon!

Perfmon's Memory: Pages Input/sec counter. This is the performance counter that'll tell you if you're short on RAM. Occasional spikes are expected (unavoidable in fact), but the goal here is that the avergae is as close to zero as possible.